Posted by: Mistress Mindy
I’ve been incredibly lucky to meet some wonderful new subs in the past few weeks, and I’ve had a lot of questions about etiquette and the way I prefer things done. Of course, every Domme is different, so I thought I’d expand on my etiquette section here and let you know my personal preferences when it comes to communication, sessioning, and other forms of interaction between myself and my lovely subs and slaves!
Initial Communication
I often get emails from people who have stumbled across my site who simply state “I’d love to book a session – what are your rates?”. I completely understand the desire to get this question out of the way before you proceed to a booking, but tribute rates vary widely depending on the length of the session you’re interested in and the activities you’d like to include. An ideal initial email should include a brief introduction summarizing your interests and experience. It’s absolutely fine if you have no experience or don’t really know what your specific interests are yet – just introduce yourself to me with some information about what got you into kink, what sort of things you’re curious about, and anything I should know about limits/activities you absolutely have no interest in. The more detail you include in your initial email, the more interested I am to create a dialogue with you that allows our first session together to be a lot more satisfying for both of us! I’ve heard from a lot of submissives that they are afraid to include too much information or risk sounding “pushy” to a Domme. I understand this fear, but please know that I will most definitely put you in your place if I feel that you’ve crossed any lines! It’s far better for me to get a clear picture of who you are and what you’re looking for so that we can really communicate.
Furthermore, if you’re looking for a simple session that follows a script, that’s fine – just be clear about it from the outset and I will create the scenario you’re looking for. However, the majority of my submissives prefer my default approach to kink, which is to create an open dialogue that allows us to get to know each other a bit before we begin to session. I understand that some prefer to jump in feet first, but I find 90% of subs enjoy our time together much more if we’ve communicated our individual interests and can merge them.
Ongoing Communication
If we decide to move forward and book a session together, I will provide you with a mobile phone number so that we can text before we meet and work out any last minute details. I respect your privacy and need for discretion, so I will never call you unless you specifically request it. I appreciate the same courtesy – feel free to ask for a phone chat if that would make you more comfortable, but we will arrange the call ahead of time. I will usually only respond to texts as well, and will respect any limits you need to put in place in regards to phone/text contact.
Meeting
When we decide to meet for a session, I usually budget for some extra time before we begin so that we can sit down and introduce ourselves. I find this helps to ease any anxiety my subs may have, and it gives us a chance to get to know each other a little bit before we move on to more intimate kink activities! This is negotiable – some subs prefer to immediately enter into a scene, and I can work with that request. Again, communication here is key.
Feedback
After we session together, I do love receiving feedback. Many subs are afraid to provide feedback that isn’t 100% positive, but I’m quite aware that everybody has different styles and desires. I enjoy honesty, so feel free to let me know exactly what you loved and anything you’d prefer to change.
Tribute
This can be an awkward exchange for some people who have never seen a Domme before. Tribute should be in an envelope and should be handed over before the session begins. I am very often asked about the protocol for tipping – tips and gifts are graciously accepted. After all, what woman doesn’t appreciate being spoiled?
Protocol
Each Domme has a title she prefers. You should address me as “Mistress” or “Mistress Mindy”. If we are acting out a roleplay scene, my title may change, but outside of a scene, you should always address me properly.
I hope this helps shine some light on the way I like to do things! If you’re polite, honest, and open, we will have a wonderful time together. Above all, you should never be afraid to communicate your kinks, fantasies, and desires to me. I’ve been VERY lucky and have had wonderful experiences with the subs who approach me for sessions. I look forward to hearing from even more of you!
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